Life’s A Rollercoaster

I’m going to start off with one very positive note and then the rest is just pretty much crap. It’s been one of those kind of weeks!

I’m finally losing some weight!! I’m now down to 155lbs from 168lbs. It feels so good. I put on my favorite pair of black pants this morning and I could button all buttons! Yeah that’s right I still wore them and just didn’t button them all the way!  It feels so nice! I really only have about 10lbs to go. Hopefully that will happen by the end of the summer!

Now for the crap which just seems to keep piling-up. I’m having one of those weeks where everything is hitting the fan. Work got on my last nerve. I get so tired of not getting included or acknowledge there. I work on all their internal websites and whenever I need support or help from anyone it is pushed to the back burner since it’s not a client facing project. It makes me feel like my work is not important and I see that time and time and time again. Especially when we have our company meetings and every department/project is spoke about. In the six months of being here I have only got one mention. Why is this? Even the creative manager who is my manger acknowledges the others in his department and their projects but mum is the word about Jenny. I really enjoy working and achieving and making a difference but doesn’t seem like I’m doing that here. Will it get better? Can I make it better? Do I find something different? So hard to know how to make this element of my life better. I go to work 5 days a week and I’m in the office for almost 9 hours a day. I really need to be happy there, right? Any Advise? Maybe if I keep a daily log then I’ll truly know…yep that’s what I’m going to do. I’ll track how this place makes me feel for a month and make an informed decision.

As if being unhappy at my job isn’t enough but I’m really unhappy about my family. My family is such a huge part of my life and most of the time they make me really happy but over the past year it has been a struggle. Did I think things were so great between my family because I lived in Denver and only saw them on the weekends? I thought moving closer would only make it better. I guess too much of a good thing isn’t a good thing anymore?

I really feel like if you care too much and invest too much in people/work then in the end you are the one going to be hurt. If I create some distance and care a little less my feelings will not be so easily hurt. Sad but true. People will always disappoint you. And I’m tired of being disappointed…it hurts. Let’s see if I can be aloof.